Liu Li eventually musters the bravery to turn down Wu Shin and move on from what he had always believed to be love. With his mother’s constant demands, Gu Jing doubts if he can have a simple life with Liu Li and pushes him away. Will they be able to meet halfway to discover the happiness each other may provide when the other decides to give it a try and the other keeps away believing he will just cause problems? In this BLTai recap of “VIP Only,” Episode 9, let’s find out!
Warning: Spoiler alert. Read at your own risk.
Episode 9
When Liu Li awakens, he finds that the image of Gu Jing inside his apartment is just a dream. Reluctant to return to sleep, he phones Lai to ask if pursuing Gu Jing at this time is too late. He just doesn’t want Gu Jing to be gone from his life, even though he tells himself he can wait. Over the phone, while he sobs, Lai informs him about a medical ailment known as “cherophobia,” which is a phobia that entails the fear of becoming happy. Liu Li understands that Gu Jing might be unconsciously the same as he says, that cherophobia often avoids happy situations out of a fear of future pain and sorrow. After speaking with Da-ren, Lai also agrees with Liu Li’s thought that Gu Jing is shoving him away because he fears he will bring his family issues down on him. When he asks Liu Li whether he will let this anxiety keep him from being with Gu Jing, Liu Li replies right away that he won’t. Finally, he informs Liu Li that that day also happens to be Gu Jing’s birthday and that he also happens to know Liu Li’s home address.
On the other hand, Gu Jing’s doorbell keeps ringing, cutting short his nearly wasted moment. Much to his surprise, Liu Li is standing on the opposite side of the door and is pushing his way inside. Gu Jing pushes Liu Li away and asks why he went there, refusing to let him kiss him. Liu Li goes on to question Gu Jing about why he is drinking, but Gu Jing merely responds by asking why he is there when Wu Shin has already returned. Liu Li responds, determined to say exactly how he feels, saying he is there to find out where he stands in Gu Jing’s heart. Liu Li says that he will not go until he receives an answer from Gu Jing, who refuses to give one. Instead, Gu Jing tells him that Liu Li may be simple or act silly at times but he still finds him endearing. He also says that while it may be writing a novel, creating origami, or even falling in love, Liu Li is earnest about it. Liu Li asks him why he would push him away and make him feel like he is not enough, but Gu Jing responds that it is himself who is not enough for Liu Li. Despite mentioning all the things that he thinks are admirable about Gu Jing, the latter confesses that he can’t handle it anymore. With his mother continuously pestering him about money, Gu Jing is afraid he will no longer be able to pay in the future but still finds himself unable to get rid of her as he still recognizes her as his mother. Gu Jing is scared that when his mother finds out about Liu Li, she will also reach out to him and bother him. Finally, Gu Jing admits that he fears not being able to commit and give Liu Li happiness because of these concerns. Instead of answering Gu Jing, Liu Li hugs him tightly and promises that if he can’t handle it alone, then he will go through it with him. Liu Li continues that, while he might not be able to solve all of Gu Jing’s problems, he can serve as his battery to refill his energy when life tires him out. As Gu Jing completely breaks down in his arms, Liu Li tells him that he doesn’t want him to go through his problems alone. Like how they have previously compared people with bluebirds, Liu Li tells Gu Jing that when a bluebird is not needed, it is just an ordinary bird, and it has to be around another bluebird to find its happiness. As they gaze into each other’s eyes, Liu Li promises Gu Jing that he can be his bluebird before he plants a kiss on the latter’s forehead and wishes him a happy birthday. Liu Li asks Gu Jing to let him celebrate his birthdays with him from now on and kisses him. Gu Jing agrees before returning the kiss. The simple kiss turns deep until the two end up in Gu Jing’s bed and make love.